Saturday, December 15, 2018

Festivus

An attempt was made to put up a Christmas tree at my house.

Dax didn't agree with the placement and proceeded to drag it across the living room.

"It wasn't feng shui."
The imp has been extra destructive the past few months.

As long as he can see me working, he's fine.  Lo and behold, do not attempt to go out on the town without him.

The price is steep.
irreparable silk blouse

He never messes with my running shoes, work boots, work clothes or pyjamas. Anything worthy of being seen in public... demolished on a daily basis.  I've been claiming to want to become more minimalist in my lifestyle and he's helping.
Purging me of unneeded possessions must be so tiring on the little guy.
"Mummy, rub my belly, I'm having a hard time digesting the soap I ate".

I haven't even had a chance to box up wrapped Christmas presents when he'd plucked them from my desk and shredded them.

Why can't the other three rub off on him a bit?

Can it be that hard to be good? 

Answer is a resounding YES.  Here monsieur is trying to fetch the burning stick in the fireplace.  For the love of God---- stop the insanity.
The Christmas tree was returned to the office and I've come up with Plan B.  I've put up a Festivus pole for the holidays.

This is it.  My holiday decoration.  The Festivus pole is the symbol of the secular holiday celebrated on December 23, as an alternative to the commercialism of Christmas.  Tradition is to gather around the pole and hold "Airing of Grievances" (I wish I'd saved the bags of evidence of Dax's destruction) and then to explain events that can only be labelled as "Festivus Miracles" (such as the muffins that remained on the counter when Dax was home alone--- that's a true miracle).
Happy Festivus from my family to yours.